In the face of hardships

1 07 2010

What is one supposed to do when everything goes wrong? How is one supposed to handle it? I’m certain that it feels like an awful nightmare that one wishes to wake up to a different world, because I’m living it right now.

Losing lots of money and thereby peace of mind is a kind of tragedy that can make one more than just feel sad. When it is coupled with loss of time, effort, valuables and lots of “if only I could have done it differently or so and so way” thoughts and moments, it can be very depressing too. Add to that a few easily avoidable mistakes or acts of carelessness/complacency which have resulted in further loss, it’s the perfect recipe to make one feel nauseated and sick to stomach.

A good hearty cry would help a bit, I guess, but it has proved not to be so easy after all 🙂 It’s always believed that sharing one’s sorrows would reduce their effect to half. But what I’ve observed lately is that more and more one talks about the bad/negative stuff, the more difficult  it becomes to be free of those torturing thoughts. This results in nothing but just reinforcement of those negative feelings.

Isn’t it a better idea to try to avoid thinking/talking about it as much as you can (once you are done with your initial coping efforts) and instead replace the negative thought with a positive one every time you encounter it? Easier said than done. I’m finding myself in the tug of war between the irresistible desire to talk about it (might be a natural psychological urge) to anyone who cares to listen and seemingly prudent alternative I just mentioned earlier.

Talking about the coping strategies reminds me of a short story from the great epic Mahabharatha, which I’ve heard/read somewhere:

Once Sri Krishna gave Yudhisthira a piece of writing (on whatever the medium used in those days). He asked the Pandava king to open and read it only in the case of the worst trouble/difficulty and that will provide the solution to his problem. Yudhisthira was tempted to open it in the face of many difficulties he faced in his life but he always saved it for the worse problem he might encounter in the future. At last a point came when he felt so helpless and discouraged that he decided that it’s time to seek the solution by reading the sacred writing. He opened it and guess what he found:

“This trouble/problem too will pass like the earlier ones!”

This is a very powerful piece of wisdom and strikingly true. The strength to solve our problems is within ourselves. Also, however grave may be the tragedy at the time of its occurrence, it’s impact gets reduced as time passes. Time is the best healer in the world.

I tried to practice this philosophy in the face of my recent misfortunes as much as I can and it works!

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8 responses

3 07 2010
Sushma

You will see through it… peace to you!!!

22 10 2010
Deepu

Everything passes away, except God.

22 10 2010
sireeshaavvari

True!

12 11 2011
Haritha

yah, but should not forget to learn from mistakes..Then only can the failures be stepping stones to success…

12 11 2011
sireeshaavvari

Very true but before you learn from failure, first you need to learn to deal with it. I was only talking about that in the post. Actually I wasn’t talking about “failures”, just hardships. There is difference.
Not to offend you but somehow I feel that this sentiment – failures are stepping stones for success – isn’t effective in making one deal with the situation at that phase. Learning from mistakes come in a later stage, when the mind takes over the heart.

13 11 2011
Haritha

point taken (:

12 11 2011
Haritha

Also, I would like to say, “Time” is a great healer and also a great schemer. I prefer to see time in a bad light too.

13 11 2011
sireeshaavvari

Your perception that time can be a schemer is quite interesting but I don’t quite see it in that light. Can you please explain? Thanks.

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